I haven’t forgotten about this. It’s in the back of my mind everyday. There’s just been something missing in me… I’m not quite sure what it is. I think I might have lost some of my passion and will at some point these last few months. I’ve been trying to slowly get it all back. Really.
Have you ever nearly drowned? The feeling when the water swallows you and won’t spit you back up no matter how hard you try. That’s what it felt like for me these few months. I can’t swim either, there’s a kicker, but I’m finally making it out I think. Getting somewhere, slowly.
I’ve been trying to hold on to the things that I really love: books, movies and shows. Stuff that will tell me stories and give me hope. It’s been working. Watching and re-watching “heroes” go through Vladimir Propp’s functions, but also looking to identify Folklore tale-types. Things are more fun that way, if I push myself to think like that.
We’re moving soon. Everything will be bigger… more spacious. Maybe that’ll help me too. Having space, having room to spread myself out on.
I’m still here though, I haven’t forgotten.